8
Things You Can Do to Make Any Divorce Better:
Divorce is enough to give anyone the blues, but
based on my experience with success in over 45,000 cases I can
give you the following eight tips that will definitely help make
things go more smoothly and easily. Not only that, if you follow
my advice you are bound to save lots of time, trouble and money
on your divorce.
1. Don’t rush into divorce while feeling
desperate, angry, or emotionally pressured. You have many important
decisions to make and they should be made calmly and clearly.
2. It’s OK to use an attorney, but don’t
retain one to take over your case. You should stay in control
of your divorce and your life. Because lawyers are trained in
an adversarial method of practicing law, if you let them take
control, conflict is bound to escalate, making things worse.
3. Take an active role in your divorce: educate
yourself about the procedures, become informed about the rules,
and make your own decisions. The more involved you become, the
better the outcome.
4. Keep it simple! If one spouse gets an attorney,
the other one might too. Two attorneys start off costing just
double, but soon they are writing letters, filing motions and
creating conflict, which means escalating costs. Do as much as
you can yourself and save on legal fees so you can send your own
child to college — not some lawyer’s.
5. Remember that fighting will not prevent a divorce,
it will only make it more unpleasant and much more expensive.
Use my proven techniques to calm yourself and settle things down
so you can more easily and painlessly reach the agreements that
you ultimately are going to make anyway.
6. Realize that most divorce problems are not
legal problems, but rather are emotional and personal problems.
Neither the law nor attorneys have solutions for these types of
problems. Trying to use legal tools on personal problems only
makes things worse — not better.
7. Understand that fighting parents frighten children
— ask yourself if expressing your anger justifies the hurt
to your child. Children learn from what you do, not what you say.
By working to settle your differences and come to agreement, you
teach your children that problems can be solved.
8. Consider that the real divorce is free. It’s
about ending one life and beginning another, then making it work
—spiritually, emotionally and practically. Successfully
meeting the emotional, physical and practical challenges is hard
work, but it will lead to a better divorce and be well worth it.
I give detailed advice on how to follow these
steps in Divorce Solutions: How to Make Any Divorce Better.
Article Directory: http://www.articlecube.com Ed Sherman is a
divorce specialist attorney and award-winning author of How to
Do Your Own Divorce in California. His books and software have
saved millions of people billions of dollars in unnecessary attorney
fees. Visit Nolo
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