Robert
Elias Najemy
Margarita’s husband just left her for another
woman. Her world has collapsed. She feels rejected, betrayed,
hurt, depressed, belittled, shamed, fearful, bitter, injustice
and anger and even revenge at times.
She fears that she will not be able to cope with
life alone. She fears that she will not find another man now at
her age and with two children. She fears engaging in another relationship,
because this one did not work and she can not stand going through
this trauma again. She fears that alone she will not be socially
acceptable, that she will not have much in common with her married
friends.
She feels rejected because he preferred another
woman and hurt because he did not treat her with respect and love.
She is depressed because he feels tired and helpless to do anything
to better her life. If she did not have the children, she would
crawl into a bed and do nothing. She feels shamed and demeaned
as a woman, that she has lost her self-worth as a woman, because
she was not able to keep her husband’s interest.
She feels anger and thinks of revenge because
she believes that he is to blame for her unhappiness and her helpless
situation. She would like to make him hurt as she is hurting.
On the other hand she also feels guilty. Perhaps
she also made a number of mistakes. She was always nagging him
and never satisfied with him as a person. One might ask her why
she is so unhappy that he left, when she never had a good word
to say about him, and never really accepted him or respected him.
It is no wonder that he sought out someone who would accept him.
What could Margarita's lessons be?
What can she learn from this situation?
Could it be that she has to learn some of the
following lessons:
To realize that she can be happy and secure without
him?
To realize that her self-worth is not dependent
on whether he wants to be with her or prefers her to all others?
To learn to be happy and fulfilled within herself?
To learn to forgive and love and accept him even
if he prefers not to be with her at this time, or even if he prefers
to be with someone else?
To examine within herself to see what she may
have done which might have made him unhappy or unfulfilled?
To free herself from the belief that she will
be abandoned again?
To overcome her attachment to the other, or to
having a partner at all?
To free herself from any beliefs which conclude
that she does not deserve to have a happy relationship?
To free herself from negative childhood experiences
which may have created a negative subconscious image of relationships?
To learn to give and take with a wider circle
of persons and not limit her love to only one person?
To be more positive and less demanding and less
attached in her relationships?
To give more of herself to the other?
That life is giving her exactly what she needs
for her next step in her evolution?
To learn to be more satisfied with and encouraging
to her next partner?
Participating in a self-knowledge group will help
her to discover what she needs to learn and support her in that
process.
Article Source: http://www.articles-galore.com Robert E. Najemy,
author of 25 books and life coach with 30 years of experience,
has trained over 300 life coaches and now does so over the Internet.
Become a life coach.Over 600 free article and lectures at www.HolisticHarmony.com/
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