| James
Walsh
The woman hailed from a very orthodox community
that strictly lived by the teachings in the Bible. In a normal
situation, you do not find these people acting against the teachings
of the people. But then I realised that things should not continue
once they reach the threshold point beyond which things can’t
sustain.
I had also read cases where children are equally
abused physically by their fathers under the influence of alcohol.
This is ever more intolerable as children neither have the courage
or the strength to tolerate such abuse.
Now, the prime question that needs to be addressed
at this point will be that of whether one continues or terminates
a marriage on account of physical abuse in a relationship. Let
us analyse.
Addressing Physical Abuse in a Relationship
While dealing or addressing physical abuse in
a relationship, you need to answer your own question of what you
need from the relationship and that of life. If your partner is
rough in his ways and torments you day in and day out, you will
have to understand that such behavioural patterns are deep rooted.
The future of this relationship much depends on
how you would want to respond to this behaviour. At this juncture,
you just have two choices. By the first choice, you need to stay
along with your spouse, analyse what is causing this irate behaviour
in him and then try to find a remedy to the problem. On the other
hand, if you feel that you will not be able take any more of this
nonsense and that it could affect your confidence and self esteem,
you might as well walk out of the relationship, the only other
choice.
What does the Law State?
Spousal abuse of any form should never be tolerated,
especially physical abuse. When physical abuse either leads to
embarrassment in public or injuries being inflicted on the individual,
he or she can approach the court of law to initiate a divorce
proceeding. In order to substantiate your appeal for a divorce,
you need to document the happenings which will further strengthen
the case in your favour.
On the other hand, if you have children or others
in the household who have been physically abused, harmed or even
threatened, you can ask the abuser to stay away from your residence
even while the divorce proceedings are on. The law does not allow
for the endangerment of life and recommends a split for the safety
of the individuals involved in the relationship.
How to Approach Physical Abuse
In the event that you feel that you can correct
the behavioural pattern of your spouse towards physical abuse,
you can do so by all means. You need to clearly set your boundaries
with your abusive spouse and make your priorities and intentions
very clear. Correcting the behavioural pattern needs a lot of
courage, effort and time to be spent from your end. There are
people who have succeeded in doing so and have lived happily.
There have people who have dropped out in between having realised
that all their efforts have gone in vain. The call is yours.
On the other hand, if you want to go ahead with
a divorce, it is a welcome move as well, especially when children
are involved in the relationship. At this point, your safety along
with that of your children will receive the highest priority.
Children are most prone to damages. Apart from coping with external
injuries they might also be subjected to psychological problems
and illnesses related to stress. Further, they might as well suffer
from lack of confidence and guilt of having been a witness to
all the abuse.
If you are not able to handle your abusive spouse
yourself, it is recommended that you get in touch with the local
police who would take a rigid stand on any form of domestic violence.
On the other hand, you can also seek help from women self help
groups, who can direct you on how to handle this situation more
effectively.
As a last word, I recommend this to one and all.
If you can’t tolerate, don’t put up with it. Get out
of it immediately. It is time to reinstate your rights as an individual.
Article Directory: http://www.articlecube.com James Walsh is
a freelance writer and copy editor. If you want to find out more
about a solicitor managed divorce see www.managed-divorce.co.uk
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