Jon
Arnold
With an estimated percentage of divorce in the
United States set at 40% (and some studies indicating an even
higher percentage), recent years have seen more and more couples
dissolving their marriage. The act of divorce is a difficult and
hard transition for adults, but also takes a deep-seated toll
on the children involved in the process. The issue of a child
and divorce comes up many times within the judicial system and
even after the property is split and child support set, the after-effects
of a failed marriage continue to affect children for many years
to come.
Today, the chances of a divorcing couple involving
a child are rather high. While parents are struggling to sort
out their personal feelings regarding the process, sometimes the
implications of a child and divorce are often ignored. In some
cases, divorce proceedings are put off for the sake of children,
but often result in worse circumstances for younger individuals
caught in the crossfire of feuding parents.
In many cases of divorce, the overall process
devastates one or both parents, while other couples may also display
a sense of relief. Regardless of the negative or positive emotions
associated with divorce, a child nonetheless becomes confused
or scared. Their sense of security is threatened and the previous
vision they held regarding their family is shattered, as new circumstances
and situations surface. During this difficult period in time,
divorce sometimes forces a child to shuffle between both parents,
further weakening their sense of security and routine.
A child and divorce brings about many issues that
young minds are often unable to comprehend. This is especially
true when a parent turns to their children for comfort. Unfortunately,
unstable parents may take their frustrations out on their children.
When the issue of divorce is not properly explained to a child
that is old enough to understand, their confusion may develop
into self-blame or guilt. It is not uncommon to see child and
divorce cases where the offspring believes they are the source
of their parent's unhappiness.
A child of divorce may also feel an obligation
to bridge the gap between their mother and father, attempting
to bring them back together. This often involves making sacrifices
on their own behalf. When the conflict between parents is intense,
a child may face great unhappiness and uncertainty. The negativity
may affect their self-esteem and overall well being, as it is
proven that traumatic divorce cases involving children place them
at a higher risk of developing both physical and mental sickness.
Divorce cases that involve a child typically produce
mental, emotional, and financial concerns. Child and divorce means
that parents must work out an agreement regarding custody, which
may come in the form of joint-custodial rights, visitation, or
sole custody. Parents must also work out child support terms,
where parents without custody must pay for some of the expenses
associated with parenting.
Emotionally, a child and divorce means stress
and tension, meaning parents are responsible for making the transition
easier on young minds. Sadness, confusion, powerlessness, and
anger are just some of the things a child of divorce may experience.
These emotions also have the power to strain relationships between
parents and children. Mentally and socially, a child of divorce
faces obstacles that may affect their learning and socialization
skills. They may act out at school or suffer developmental setbacks.
Adolescents might get into more trouble, including cutting class
and receiving poor marks on tests.
Overall, both short-term and long-term effects
are felt with kids of divorced parents. Under the divorce court
system, judges and lawyers face the responsibility to make the
best decisions regarding both child and divorce proceedings.
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